Lost? Here's Part One.
An exhausted Dr. T asks an exhausted Mr. Z:
An exhausted Dr. T asks an exhausted Mr. Z:
"Where'd you study?"
Once more I wondered: STUDIED WHAT? Flailing? The samba? Again I ask, why was this left in if the point was to cut down on the weirdness?
Using his hypnotic waggle, Dr. T gets Mrs. Collins to help him, in so many words, seduce Mr. Zabladowski.
Mr. Z:
“I just picked it up. What’s the idea tryin’a put the whammy on me? I just came up here peacefully to take a look.”
Dr. T:
“Well now that you’ve had your look, be gone! Whatever your duties in my institute may be, return to your post at once and resume your labours!”
Mr. Z:
“Oh no I won’t. I’ve come to the conclusion, for your information, that I’m not putting in any more sinks!”
Mrs. C:
“Oh, but dear Mr. Zabladowski, you must. If this man doesn’t put in the sinks, the County Sink Inspector won’t certify the place as sanitary.”
Dr.T:
“And we won’t be able to open the institute tomorrow…”
Mr. Z:
‘That’s perfectly all right with me. Good bye!”
Mrs. C:
“Please, I’m sure it’s all been a mistake. Dear Dr. Terwilliker thought you were an intruder. It was a case of mistaken identity, wasn’t it, Dr. Terwilliker?”
Dr. T:
“Of course, dear boy! Whether you know it or not, you are a cog in this great operation!”
Mr. Z:
“I’m no cog! I don’t even like the sound of it. I am an independent contractor.”
Dr. T:
“Well, let me put it this way. You’re a key man and a valuable ally, a big wheel within all my wheels. You, if I may say so, alone of all my people, are the indispensable man!”
Mr. Z:
“Well, that’s probably true, but I’m still not satisfied. I…I’ve heard rumours about your operation.”
By this point they have strolled into Dr. Terwilliker’s office; Mr. Zabladowski is referring quite pointedly to the conspicuous pile of money in the corner.
Trilling his voice for all it’s worth, Dr. T declares:
Trilling his voice for all it’s worth, Dr. T declares:
“Rumours? Scuttlebutt! I can tell you all about the rumours.”
He proceeds to unlock his safe, and quite literally shovel money into it.
Dr. T:
“I’m a villain. I’m a loathsome racketeer. This money you see before you, I’ve stolen it from the pocketbooks of unsuspecting mothers. Filthy. Lying. Rumours! Why, this is a problem that every great man faces. The rumours of corruption that breeds in high places, rumours seeking to discredit my noble aims! And now these rumours have crept into me own house, vilifying and besmirching my honesty, my fair name, my….integrity.”
Mr. Z:
“You talk a lot, but I don’t know how much you say.”
Mrs.C:
“Mr. Zabladowski, there isn’t anything at all to these silly old rumours. The sole purpose of our endeavour is the musical betterment of American youth.”
Mr. Z:
“You know, the way you put it, it doesn’t sound so bad.”
Dr. T:
“Oh, you’re a sensitive, intelligent, and highly creative person. Let’s talk this over. I’m sure we can get together!”
Mr. Z:
“I’ve still got my doubts. Serious doubts!”
Mrs. C:
“Mr. Zabladowski…”
Dr. T:
“No, make yourself comfortable. Relax! Have a smoke. Have a cigar!”
This tragically short sequence features some adorable Dr. Seuss contraptions. I would have loved more of this sort of thing while they were going about the business of designing practical sets.
"Hot cakes? Layer cakes? Fish cakes? Peanut brittle? The blue plate special, or chicken pot pie?"
“Schnapps? Sake? Slivovitz? Schweppes? Tequila? Turtle tears, or just plain cocoa?”
Speaking as someone who knows she shouldn't...I drink pickle juice. I said earlier that I wouldn’t kick Hans Conried out of bed, and that stands, especially having seen those legs, tho; but a barrel of finely aged pickle juice would seal the deal for my fucking dowry.
"From our very own pickle vineyards!"
Located next to the scenic No.2 Spot!
Having been thoroughly wined and dined, Mr. Zabladowski is ready for a good old-fashioned hoedown. Welcome to 'Get Together Weather', one of the more charming bits of fluffery to be found in this movie. Here's a link to the video - yes, video! - if you can't see it below.
Having been thoroughly wined and dined, Mr. Zabladowski is ready for a good old-fashioned hoedown. Welcome to 'Get Together Weather', one of the more charming bits of fluffery to be found in this movie. Here's a link to the video - yes, video! - if you can't see it below.
If you don't laugh at 1:26 then I have nothing more to say to you.
Get Together Weather is lovely. I really think that’s the best word for it. It’s very reminiscent of ‘Good Morning’ from Singin’ In The Rain': two dudes and a lady leaping on and off furniture in the spirit of camaraderie as they discuss the weather. Only instead of stiff smiling faces and rigorously practiced tap routines, there’s a whole lotta freestyling, which is hilariously adorable, and a whole lot of acting going on in the background. Dr. T reacts with horror every time Mrs. Collins and Mr. Zabladowski get a little too close, and is always sure to come in and break them up. Mrs. Collins, on the other hand, gets all starry-eyed when she glances at Mr. Zabladowski.
In a way, it feels like it’s trying to make fun of Good Morning. I have no way of knowing if that was intentional, and considering Singin’ In The Rain only came out the year before, I doubt it was. I just can’t get it out of my head that it was meant to poke fun at that particular brand of stiffly rehearsed and sanitized Hollywood spectacle. Not that I think fun should be made of Kelly, O’Connor and Reynolds. Quite the opposite. I just think there was room back then for something a little less white bread every once in a while. Apparently most folks did not agree with me.
Mr. Zabladowski, having been brainwashed by cigars, pickle juice and freeform dance, heads back to work. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Dr. T tells Mrs. Collins to get the physics laboratory on the phone.
Mr. Zabladowski, having been brainwashed by cigars, pickle juice and freeform dance, heads back to work. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Dr. T tells Mrs. Collins to get the physics laboratory on the phone.
Dr. T:
"When the plumber Zabladowski has installed the last sink, I want him disintegrated. I want you to disintegrate him slowly."
This is just...so wonderful.
Dr. T, having seen the undeniable chemistry between his lady and his plumber, decides she needs to be kept on a tighter leash:
"You're beginning to build up an immunity to my little hypnotic trances. I think you'd better spend tonight...in your Lock-Me-Tight."
